Many marriages would be better if the husband and wife clearly understood that they're on the same side.
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.
My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
The truly free man is the one who can turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse.
I got a king-sized bed. I don't know any kings, but if one came over, I guess he'd be comfortable.
I'm sorry this letter is so long, I didn't have time to make it shorter.
A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Above all, if what you've done is stupid, but it works, it ain't stupid.
I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.
I didn't fail the test, I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.
Take me down to the bar! We'll drink breakfast together!
No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it's only a question of degree.
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.
Only a woman can make you feel wrong for doing something right.
You'll never find a rainbow if you're looking down