I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back.

Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way, ask if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future.

No man for any considerable period can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true.

All satire is blind to the forces liberated by decay. Which is why total decay has absorbed the forces of satire.

The future is something which every one reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is.

The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good thing for the first time.

I must uphold my ideals, for perhaps the time will come when I shall be able to carry them out.

The cloud is free only to go with the wind. The rain is free only in falling.

Animals, whom we have made our slaves, we do not like to consider our equal.

Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.

Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.

Who the hell wants fourteen pairs of shoes when they go on holiday? I haven't had fourteen pairs in my life.

When it is not in our power to determine what is true, we ought to follow what is most probable.

No matter how thin you slice it, there will always be two sides.

If a little is great, and a lot is better, then way too much is just about right!

Charity ... is the opium of the privileged.

Women have the right to work wherever they want, as long as they have the dinner ready when you get home.

Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

The only thing worse than being blind is having sight but no vision.

Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel.

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.