Reality is wrong. Dreams are for real.

Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead.

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.

Christmas to a child is the first terrible proof that to travel hopefully is better than to arrive.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

Be like a tree and let the dead leaves drop.

You’ll miss the best things if you keep your eyes shut.

I like to think of myself at home in the armchair, writing, smoking and occasionally wandering down the shop.

The paranoid is never entirely mistaken.

Women have the right to work wherever they want, as long as they have the dinner ready when you get home.

If the only prayer you said was thank you, that would be enough.

The more you like yourself, the less you are like anyone else, which makes you unique.

Radical simply means 'grasping things at the root'.

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned.

We often discover what will do by finding out what will not do; and probably he who never made a mistake never made a discovery.

You don't have to be the Dalai Lama to tell people that life's about change.

There is only one way... to get anybody to do anything. And that is by making the other person want to do it.

All men are liable to error; and most men are, in many points, by passion or interest, under temptation to it.

Those who hammer their guns into plows, will plow for those who do not.

Reverence does not die with mortals, nor does it perish whether they live or die.

We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the mental institution of the universe.