I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.
You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.
The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.
I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
I dont know where I am going, but I am on my way.
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
I can't do the same thing every night, the same gestures... it's like putting on dirty panties every day.
A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But in practice, there is.
When I was in school the teachers told me practice makes perfect; then they told me nobodys perfect so I stopped practicing.
Marge, you're as beautiful as Princess Leia and as smart as Yoda.
Imagine being killed by a bow and arrow. That would suck, an arrow killed you? They would never solve the crime. 'Look at that dead guy. Let's go that way.
You live but once; you might as well be amusing.
Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?
I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.