You cant have a plan for your day, til you have a plan for your life.

Only those with no memory insist on their originality.

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.

The hardest thing to explain is the glaringly evident which everybody has decided not to see.

A moral being is one who is capable of reflecting on his past actions and their motives - of approving of some and disapproving of others

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.

If you follow every dream, you might get lost.

I have noticed that nothing I have never said ever did me any harm.

There is only one difference between a madman and me. The madman thinks he is sane. I know I am mad.

Human decency is not derived from religion. It precedes it.

Being sober on a bus is, like, totally different than being drunk on a bus.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

Purity of heart is to will one thing.

I speak for the trees, for the trees have no tongues.

But some emotions don't make a lot of noise. It's hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint - like a heartbeat. And pure love why, some days it's so quiet, you don't even know it's there.

I got rabies shots for biting the head off a bat but that`s OK - the bat had to get Ozzy shots.

A hero cannot be a hero unless in a heroic world.

A good liar must have a good memory.

Thought is free.

Comedy is acting out optimism.

Common looking people are the best in the world: that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.