Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!
He has a brilliant mind until he makes it up.
The reason fat men are good natured is they can neither fight nor run.
I'm sure the universe is full of intelligent life. It's just been too intelligent to come here.
The truly free man is the one who can turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse.
If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.
I'm single because I was born that way.
The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.
We are all born sexual creatures,thank God, but it's a pity so many people despise and crush this natural gift.
I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.
I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time' so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.
What a fine weather today! Can't choose whether to drink tea or to hang myself.
Never tell your problems to anyone...20% don't care and the other 80% are glad you have them.
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.
Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.
I didn't fail the test, I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.
If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.
Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later.