It is better to be alone than in bad company.

The truly free man is the one who can turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse.

I've learned one thing: you can only really get to know a person after a row. Only then can you judge their true character!

A writer needs a pen, an artist needs a brush, but a filmmaker needs an army.

I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments

I'm sorry this letter is so long, I didn't have time to make it shorter.

[Meeting Aliens] Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!

He's very clever, but sometimes his brains go to his head.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

When you're thirty you're old enough to know better, but still young enough to go ahead and do it.

We are all born sexual creatures,thank God, but it's a pity so many people despise and crush this natural gift.

If you are flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.

Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money

If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.

I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later.

The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept.

There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.

I dont know where I am going, but I am on my way.