I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
You live but once; you might as well be amusing.
Ill put off readingLolitafor six more years until she turns 18.
I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen.
Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.
Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?
Only a woman can make you feel wrong for doing something right.
Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts.
Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine.
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
I didn't fail the test, I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.
There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
Itís a terrible thing to appear on television Ė because people think you actually know what youíre talking about!
Iíve been bitten by a python. It wasnít a very big oneÖ
Animals are my friends...and I don't eat my friends.
One thing you can't hide - is when you're crippled inside.