I'm sure the universe is full of intelligent life. It's just been too intelligent to come here.
And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.
My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return.
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money
I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.
A smile is the best way to get away with trouble even if it's a fake one.
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
Ill put off readingLolitafor six more years until she turns 18.
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
I didn't fail the test, I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.
I've always believed in the adage that the secret of eternal youth is arrested development.
If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?
Only dumb people try to impress smart people. Smart people just do what they do.
I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.
I've learned one thing: you can only really get to know a person after a row. Only then can you judge their true character!
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money.
I had a dream that I was awake and I woke up to find myself asleep.
I have left orders to be awakened at any time during national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting.