A smile is the best way to get away with trouble even if it's a fake one.

He has a brilliant mind until he makes it up.

I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.

The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.

I’ve been bitten by a python. It wasn’t a very big one…

Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

Animals are my friends...and I don't eat my friends.

There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor.

Above all, if what you've done is stupid, but it works, it ain't stupid.

I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

It's nice to have a lot of money, but you know, you don't want to keep it around forever. I prefer buying things. Otherwise, it's a little like saving sex for your old age.

Cynicism is humour in ill health.

You'll never find a rainbow if you're looking down

I will not join any club who will take me as a member

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.

If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.

He looks as though he's been weaned on a pickle.

As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.