Marge, you're as beautiful as Princess Leia and as smart as Yoda.
Sex is an emotion in motion.
What a fine weather today! Can't choose whether to drink tea or to hang myself.
Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask whats for lunch.
He's very clever, but sometimes his brains go to his head.
I drink to make other people more interesting.
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didnt know.
If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.
I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.
He could not see a belt without hitting below it.
I've learned one thing: you can only really get to know a person after a row. Only then can you judge their true character!
That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.
If you tell people you talk to God, they'll think you're religious, but if you say God talks to you, it's ten to one they'll think you're crazy.
If you can keep your son off the pipe and your daughter off the pole, you're ahead of the game.
Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it's not all mixed up.
Many marriages would be better if the husband and wife clearly understood that they're on the same side.
Anyone who makes up their mind about an issue before they hear the issue is a fool.
Waffles are like pancakes with syrup traps
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.