Our great democracies still tend to think that a stupid man is more likely to be honest than a clever man.
If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong.
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didnt know.
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
I've been on a calendar, but never on time.
No good deed goes unpunished.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
If I play a stupid girl and ask a stupid question, I've got to follow it through, what am I supposed to do, look intelligent?
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
There are only two types of women: goddesses and doormats.
I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.
I'm sure the universe is full of intelligent life. It's just been too intelligent to come here.
I drink to make other people more interesting.
There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
It is better to be alone than in bad company.
I love great music and art, but I think 'cubist' songs and paintings are hideous.
Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!
When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it's not all mixed up.