If I play a stupid girl and ask a stupid question, I've got to follow it through, what am I supposed to do, look intelligent?
Well, if she was dumb enough to marry you, she'll believe anything.
I have nothing but respect for you - and not much of that.
I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there.
I've learned one thing: you can only really get to know a person after a row. Only then can you judge their true character!
I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.
I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.
Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves.
Animals are my friends...and I don't eat my friends.
Life's but short. You might as well be amusing.
To the uneducated, an A is just three sticks.
Never travel faster than your guardian angel can fly.
I’ve been bitten by a python. It wasn’t a very big one…
All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.
You know, boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have to read the manual and press the right buttons.
If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?