I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.

Nothing is permanent in this wicked world, not even our troubles.

I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.

You'll never find a rainbow if you're looking down

All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.

The truly free man is the one who can turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse.

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money

What do I wear in bed? Why, Chanel No. 5, of course.

I have a perfect cure for a sore throat: cut it.

I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.

Ill put off readingLolitafor six more years until she turns 18.

You could talk about same-sex marriage, but people who have been married (say) 'It's the same sex all the time.

We are all born sexual creatures,thank God, but it's a pity so many people despise and crush this natural gift.

We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.

What a fine weather today! Can't choose whether to drink tea or to hang myself.

Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask whats for lunch.

When you're drowning you don't think, 'I would be incredibly pleased if someone would notice I'm drowning and come and rescue me.' You just scream.

When you're thirty you're old enough to know better, but still young enough to go ahead and do it.

There are only two types of women: goddesses and doormats.

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.