This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.

You can't produce a baby in one month by getting nine women pregnant.

Many marriages would be better if the husband and wife clearly understood that they're on the same side.

God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time.

I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.

We are all born sexual creatures,thank God, but it's a pity so many people despise and crush this natural gift.

Cynicism is humour in ill health.

Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.

If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

I have a perfect cure for a sore throat: cut it.

I've heard that hard work never killed anyone, but I say why take the chance?

When you jump for joy, beware that no one moves the ground from beneath your feet.

I've always believed in the adage that the secret of eternal youth is arrested development.

The best liar is he who makes the smallest amount of lying go the longest way.

I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.

Life's but short. You might as well be amusing.

I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.

You live but once; you might as well be amusing.