You'll never find a rainbow if you're looking down
Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?
Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it's not all mixed up.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.
A sense of humour is great - it goes a long, long way in a marriage.
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
I used to think anyone doing anything weird was weird. Now I know that it is the people that call others weird that are weird.
I have nothing but respect for you - and not much of that.
Anyone who makes up their mind about an issue before they hear the issue is a fool.
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
I do this real moron thing, it's called thinking, and I'm not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions.
I've always believed in the adage that the secret of eternal youth is arrested development.
This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.
Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine.
What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts.
Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!
You can't get spoiled if you do your own ironing.
He looks as though he's been weaned on a pickle.
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
I have a perfect cure for a sore throat: cut it.