Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.

There is no real ending. It's just the place where you stop the story.

Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.

I don't watch television, I think it destroys the art of talking about oneself.

If a little is great, and a lot is better, then way too much is just about right!

We are all now connected by the Internet, like neurons in a giant brain.

Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.

Of puns it has been said that those who most dislike them are those who are least able to utter them.

We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the mental institution of the universe.

When I had nothing to lose, I had everything. When I stopped being who I am, I found myself.

All satire is blind to the forces liberated by decay. Which is why total decay has absorbed the forces of satire.

Abuse of words has been the great instrument of sophistry and chicanery, of party, faction, and division of society.

Any product that needs a manual to work is broken.

I love children, especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.

Wisely, and slow. They stumble that run fast.

Authority, without any condition and reservation, belongs to the nation.

New opinions are always suspected, and usually opposed, without any other reason but because they are not common.

You don't have to be the Dalai Lama to tell people that life's about change.

Only those with no memory insist on their originality.

God creates, I do not create. I assemble and I steal everywhere to do it - from what I see, from what the dancers can do, from what others do.

Don't send me flowers when I'm dead. If you like me, send them while I'm alive.