I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

Anyone who makes up their mind about an issue before they hear the issue is a fool.

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

My God. We've had cloning in the South for years. It's called cousins.

War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

There are only two types of women: goddesses and doormats.

A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.

Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.

I love great music and art, but I think 'cubist' songs and paintings are hideous.

Only dumb people try to impress smart people. Smart people just do what they do.

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didnt know.

He has a brilliant mind until he makes it up.

If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

When you jump for joy, beware that no one moves the ground from beneath your feet.

You live but once; you might as well be amusing.

Women are made to be loved not understood.

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.

It's nice to have a lot of money, but you know, you don't want to keep it around forever. I prefer buying things. Otherwise, it's a little like saving sex for your old age.

To truly laugh, you must be able to take your pain, and play with it.

When you're drowning you don't think, 'I would be incredibly pleased if someone would notice I'm drowning and come and rescue me.' You just scream.

I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.