Of puns it has been said that those who most dislike them are those who are least able to utter them.
It is the story that owns and directs us. It is the thing that makes us different from cattle; it is the mark on the face that sets one people apart from their neighbors.
Boards don't hit back.
Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead.
Never lend your car to someone you've given birth to.
All satire is blind to the forces liberated by decay. Which is why total decay has absorbed the forces of satire.
Charity ... is the opium of the privileged.
Learn to give, whether you have plenty or little, whether you are happy or in pain.
The right of a nation to kill a tyrant in case of necessity can no more be doubted than to hang a robber, or kill a flea.
Some newspapers are fit only to line the bottom of bird cages.
Laziness never arrived at the attainment of a good wish.
When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy.
The people I distrust most are those who want to improve our lives but have only one course of action.
I can see in your eyes, I can see in your faces, I can see you cry. But what I want to say, there's no reason to cry. Do not, in the name of peace, go in the streets and riot.
A lie never lives to be old.
Sanity is a madness put to good uses.
The idea is to write it so that people hear it and it slides through the brain and goes straight to the heart.
There is not such a cradle of democracy upon the earth as the Free Public Library, this republic of letters, where neither rank, office, nor wealth receives the slightest consideration.
Domination delegates the physical violence on which it rests to the dominated.
Give them pleasure. The same pleasure they have when they wake up from a nightmare.
What do you despise? By this are you truly known.