Being sober on a bus is, like, totally different than being drunk on a bus.

In ballet a complicated story is impossible to tell... we can't dance synonyms.

If a little is great, and a lot is better, then way too much is just about right!

Human decency is not derived from religion. It precedes it.

Memories warm you up from the inside. But they also tear you apart.

It seldom happens that any felicity comes so pure as not to be tempered and allayed by some mixture of sorrow.

Society is now one polished horde, Formed of two mighty tribes, The Bores and the Bored.

Where grief is fresh, any attempt to divert it only irritates.

To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities.

Tell me thy company, and I shall tell thee what thou art.

You can have everything in life that you want if you just give enough other people what they want.

We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the mental institution of the universe.

There is only one difference between a madman and me. The madman thinks he is sane. I know I am mad.

The keenest sorrow is to recognize ourselves as the sole cause of all our adversities.

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

Ah just act the way ah feel.

If we all worked on the assumption that what is accepted as true is really true, there would be little hope of advance.

A toast, Jedediah, to love on my terms. Those are the only terms anybody ever knows - his own.

I'm not a genius. I'm just a tremendous bundle of experience.

The dogmas of the quiet past are inadequate to the stormy present. The occasion is piled high with difficulty, and we must rise with the occasion. As our case is new, so we must think anew and act anew.

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.