You can't deny laughter; when it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants.

Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo.

I sound my barbaric yawp over the rooftops of the world.

Purity of heart is to will one thing.

Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.

There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.

All is mine but nothing owned, nothing owned for memory, and mine only while I look.

I am one of those who think like Nobel, that humanity will draw more good than evil from new discoveries.

No man for any considerable period can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true.

Talk low, talk slow and don't say too much.

There is only one way... to get anybody to do anything. And that is by making the other person want to do it.

I have only ever read one book in my life, and that is White Fang. It's so frightfully good I've never bothered to read another.

Patriotism is usually stronger than class hatred, and always stronger than internationalism.

That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.

You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.

A good traveller has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving.

New opinions are always suspected, and usually opposed, without any other reason but because they are not common.

Society is now one polished horde, Formed of two mighty tribes, The Bores and the Bored.

My specialty is detached malevolence.

A lie never lives to be old.

We can't become what we need to be by remaining what we are.