Nothing is permanent in this wicked world, not even our troubles.
It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen.
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there.
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
What do I wear in bed? Why, Chanel No. 5, of course.
It is better to be alone than in bad company.
Fell in love with a beautiful blonde once. Drove me to drink. And I never had the decency to thank her.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
Don't look at me in that tone of voice.
You can't get spoiled if you do your own ironing.
If any of you cry at my funeral, I'll never speak to you again.
A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.
A writer needs a pen, an artist needs a brush, but a filmmaker needs an army.
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong.
I never travel without my diary. One must always have something sensational to read on the train.
Humor is the most engaging cowardice.
Only a woman can make you feel wrong for doing something right.
I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.
Right now Im having amnesia and dj vu at the same time. I think Ive forgotten this before.