Sanity is a madness put to good uses.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

Many have had their greatness made for them by their enemies.

I hope I shall possess firmness and virtue enough to maintain what I consider the most enviable of all titles, the character of an honest man.

If from Society we learn to live Tis Solitude should teach us how to die; It hath no flatterers.

A man of honour should never forget what he is because he sees what others are.

Racism is a much more clandestine, much more hidden kind of phenomenon, but at the same time it's perhaps far more terrible than it's ever been.

I just want to retire before I go senile because if I don't retire before I go senile, then I'll do more damage than good at that point.

There is not such a cradle of democracy upon the earth as the Free Public Library, this republic of letters, where neither rank, office, nor wealth receives the slightest consideration.

Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

A place for everything, and everything in its place.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

If everything isn't black and white, I say, 'Why the hell not?'

I speak for the trees, for the trees have no tongues.

I got rabies shots for biting the head off a bat but that`s OK - the bat had to get Ozzy shots.

I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it.

I don't do drugs, I am drugs

The universe we observe has precisely the properties we should expect if there is, at bottom, no design, no purpose, no evil and no good, nothing but blind pitiless indifference.

My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me.

Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.

I would define, in brief, the poetry of words as the rhythmical creation of Beauty.