When you're thirty you're old enough to know better, but still young enough to go ahead and do it.

One thing you can't hide - is when you're crippled inside.

Never travel faster than your guardian angel can fly.

Women are made to be loved not understood.

You can't produce a baby in one month by getting nine women pregnant.

Many marriages would be better if the husband and wife clearly understood that they're on the same side.

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine.

If it's a penny for your thoughts and you put in your two cents worth, then someone, somewhere is making a penny.

The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.

I dont know where I am going, but I am on my way.

Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.

I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.

And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

Don't look at me in that tone of voice.

Never tell your problems to anyone...20% don't care and the other 80% are glad you have them.

You can't get spoiled if you do your own ironing.

No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it's only a question of degree.